The Sexuality Lure, Stabilizing Hormones and the Skull

As I had my early morning coffee, the "Dear Abby" column captured my eye. A reader wrote in with a dating predicament and ended her letter with that often-heard stereotype that "Women use sex to get love, and males use love to obtain sex." This is a great summation of the "Sex Trap."

The Sex Trap is similar to the Love Trap, where songs analyze great sex as love. However those who fall under the Sex Trap go even farther due to the fact that for these singles, having sex carries tremendous meaning and repercussions.

Songs fall into the Sex Trap in one (or both) of 2 methods:

A.they think sex is a required test of compatibility, (if the sex is great then the relationship will ready also).

B.more commonly, all awareness heads out the window, and one or both previously level-headed songs consider themselves a dedicated couple as quickly as they make love.
Rather than looking at whether this other person might be a match on levels other than physical tourist attraction-- such as long-term requirements, needs, and desires-- they are blind-sided by the chemistry under the covers.

No doubt, it can be challenging to correspond with truth when all those hormonal agents are running wild. Our body reacts to somebody we are brought in to by producing hormones such as PEA or phenylethylamine (natural amphetamine), dopamine and norepinephrine (natural mood enhancers), and testosterone ( boosts libido), that makes the opportunity to have sex with somebody we are drawn in to extremely tough to withstand. After orgasm, we produce oxytocin (which acts on the hypothalamus to produce feelings), which makes us feel extremely close to and bonded with our sex partner.

These chemical reactions are strong and involuntary , leading to effective feelings of tourist attraction, excitement, wellness, closeness, and love .

When issues occur, those who fall into the Sex Trap often justify by believing, "Well, we've got problems, however the sex is try these out great!" They probably would not admit it, however they focus on physical intimacy and concern the rest as optional. Their primary hunting tools are sexual tourist attraction and physical compatibility.

Barry North, an RCI coach who Get More Info works mostly with gay men, says that a number of his customers have fallen into the Sex Trap.

" For gay males specifically in city areas, sex is readily available, and that in itself is a trap," North says. Why waste your time if the sex isn't going to be good?".

North adds, "I think this is a ' man' thing rather than a 'gay' thing.".
I do wish to point out that chemistry is very important. Yet, chemistry is a considered that we can't manage in a relationship; it is either there or not there, and it needs to be there for the collaboration to work. If not there, we can't "make" chemistry happen, though often it can grow with time.

Songs who pursue a relationship based upon sexual chemistry danger relationship failure when the hormone-induced intoxication diminishes and reality hits.

To prevent the Sex Trap, you should balance your heart (and hormones) discover this info here with your head. This suggests integrating chemistry with good sense. While excellent sex is very important for a sustainable relationship, you have to make your partner options by paying full focus on your vision, values, objectives, and requirements -- while feeling all those interesting sparks!

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